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Here',s what an emotional need is, list of basic emotional needs, how to figure out your own needs, and how to meet them. 9 Basic Emotional Needs Everyone Has & How To Meet Them. William Barker is an English teacher and coach helping people deal with stress and learn more about themselves.
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Roxanna Namavar, D.O. is an adult psychiatrist focusing on integrative health. She completed her residency training at the University of Virginia Health-System and currently has a private practice in New York City. We all have emotional needs. But what exactly is the definition of an emotional need? Let's talk about examples of basic emotional needs, how to figure out what our own individual needs are, and how to get those needs met. What are emotional needs? Emotional needs are feelings or conditions we need to feel happy, fulfilled, or at peace. Without them, we may feel frustrated, hurt, or dissatisfied. Some examples of emotional needs might include feeling appreciated, feeling accomplished, feeling safe, or feeling part of a community. As humans, we seek emotional nourishment as much as food and water. It is your birthright to be emotionally nourished. Everyone has their own unique set of emotional needs, which might be the product of your upbringing, your genetic predisposition, your identity, and other individual factors. But for the most basic human emotional needs, many people refer to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, a theory in psychology developed by Abraham Maslow in 1943. Displayed as a pyramid structure, Maslow's hierarchy shows the progression of human needs from basic needs like food and water at the bottom of the pyramid to self-actualization at its apex. Maslow's research psychologists have identified nine specific emotional needs common to all people across cultures. The 9 basic emotional needs: Security. We need a safe place—an environment that enables us to lead our lives without experiencing undue fear and that allows us to develop our potential. If this emotional need isn't being met: Make a list of things in your environment that make you feel insecure or unsafe, and then identify action steps you can take to change that. Perhaps you would feel more secure if you equipped your home with burglar alarms and new locks. Or perhaps you're constantly worried about being fired from your current job, you may actually find more peace by quitting or switching jobs rather than remaining in a situation that's making you feel insecure. Volition. In order to feel fulfilled, we need to feel like we have the power to exist autonomously and direct our own lives. If this emotional need isn't being met: Have a frank conversation with your boss or partner or family about where you need to have more control or clearer boundaries. It's time to be lovingly assertive about this. Attention. Receiving attention from people we care about and giving them attention in return is valuable. Giving attention to your own self is equally, if not more, valuable. If this emotional need isn't being met: Prioritize quality time with your partner and friends. Set aside time for it in your calendar. Just because we have friends or partners doesn't mean we are meeting their needs for attention or that they are meeting ours. It takes effort. Emotional connection. To be emotionally fulfilled, we need to feel connected to other people. We need to experience friendship, love, and intimacy. If this emotional need isn't being met: Make it a priority to spend time with your friends or even make new ones. If you're feeling lonely in your relationship, see if there are ways to create more emotional intimacy between you and your partner. Connection to community. We are social creatures, and our brain is a social organ. We need to feel connected to something greater than ourselves. If this emotional need isn't being met: Prioritize spending time with others. Maybe that means arranging a regular coffee get-together in your home.
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